In anticipation of his next novel, Forrest Armstrong has just released the first track from the Urban Sleep mix tape, a soundtrack that accompanies the book. The track utilizes samples from Jodorowsky’s Holy Mountain. I think it’s a solid notch above Forrest’s Eraserhead-derived beats. You can download the song and an excerpt from the novel here.
I can’t believe I never saw this before tonight.
I’m taking a train to California on Wednesday and it’s probably going to be a 21+ hour ride. I really love reading on the train and I was really looking forward to reading a few new books on this trip, but I decided that I’m going to write a collection instead. It’s going to be called “On Christmas I will wake up with superpowers and kick your ass.” However many poems and stories I can write on the train, that will be the collection. Then I’ll edit them a lot and illustrate them a little.
It will be in chapbook form. It will be free.
If you want copy of this chapbook, send your mailing address to CameronCPierce@gmail.com.
The chapbook will be limited to the number of people who ask for one.
They will probably be shipped out a few days after Christmas.
I think at least one of the stories will be about Jean Claude Van Damme.
Tonight I watched The Cat From Outer Space, Poultrygeist, and half of The Dark Backward, and I reread one of my favorite short stories (Hemingway’s The Snows of Kilimanjaro), and I wrote 700 words of a short story about Sally Field.
The Dark Backward was amazing, but the VHS that I bought at a thrift shop during the H.P. Lovecraft Film Festival in October completely broke or something, so there was no way to watch the rest of the movie.
The Cat From Outer Space was a Disney movies. It was about a cat from outer space who gets stranded on Earth and it was not a very good movie, but it had a talking cat and government conspiracies and gambling, so it wasn’t as bad as it could’ve been.
I’m not sure how I feel about this Sally Field story. I sort of just started writing it and it’s been fun, but there are other stories and things that are more important than writing this story, although I want to finish it if only for these lines: “I will kill Glen Danzig. I will kill him four times.”
I like Glen Danzig. The Misfits are still great, and Samhain and his s/t band had their good moments too. Apparently Glen Danzig refuses to sign bootlegged copies of his records, which he is an asshole for, but I’ll try not to fault him for it. I used to play bass in a band whose singer looked and sounded just like Glen Danzig. When I was in that band, we covered “Cold” from The Cure’s Pornography and “Not to Touch the Earth” by The Doors and a Bananarama song. The band is still around, so I wonder if they still cover those songs.
There is a contest going on at The Infomaniac. Today only, you can vote for the best book title of the year. You can vote for The Haunted Vagina or The Ass Goblins of Auschwitz. Those are the two choices. This makes The Infomaniac awesome. Their post from yesterday also makes them awesome, in a dirty-old-man-giving-a-blowjob sort of way (literally).
I’m going to see Melt Banana tonight.
First, I need to sell books at Powell’s.
I’m debating whether I should dress up as Banana Man for the show. It might be fun, and somebody might give me something for free.
Speaking of free things, I received Sarah Schneider’s Bearfish in the mail yesterday. I liked how the characters weren’t people, but more like blobs with small faces. I guess it’s about a lonely, vaguely depressed girl blob who becomes an intern for a writer blob and then they have a relationship and they’re both happy that she is his intern and happy about each other but then this vague sense of detachment and disinterest gets in the way and they’re no longer happy about each other. The lesson? Blobs with small faces can’t stay happy for long.
Well, not really. The story wasn’t my sort of thing, and it didn’t quite flow, and it was a bit awkward, but I’m glad I read it.
I like reading/seeing anything about blobs and other non-human things that don’t really qualify as a species. In Shark Hunting in Paradise Garden, Ernest (the protagonist) ends up in a half-state between his toad and human forms. And in The Ass Goblins of Auschwitz, the twins 999 and Otto undergo surgical procedures that almost render them unrecognizble — they’re no longer children, but they’re not quite ass goblins either. In Die You Doughnut Bastards!, the novella I’m currently writing, the protagonist suffers from Fritter’s Virus, an irreversible problem that is slowly turning him into an apple fritter. So I enjoyed Sarah Schneider’s blobs with small faces. I just wish everything — including the blobs — wasn’t so vague.
Japanese noise punk is not vague.
Maybe there should have been a Japanese noise punk band in Bearfish. Maybe everyone in the world should be in a Japanese noise punk band, and then we could all battle. We wouldn’t have Thunderdome. We would have Bananadome.
We might shake our guitar-shaped fists and say things like, “I’ll meet you in the Bananadome, Shang Tsung!” Because of course, there would have to be a Mortal Kombat cover band.
So I’m going to see Melt Banana tonight, and I might dress up as Banana Man. First, I need to trade in books and do laundry. And I think I want to read the Mortal Kombat novelization, which I bought at a thrift store in October, or reread Ultra Fuckers, Carlton Mellick’s novella about Japanese punks reeking havoc in a suburban gated community that is overtaking the planet.
I wonder if it’s going to snow or if the weather people are lying again.
Alejandro Jodorowsky is no longer making King Shot, his metaphysical gangster film starring Marilyn Manson as a 300-year-old pope. That’s a serious bummer, but he is slated to direct a sequel to El Topo. I don’t know how I feel about that. Read the entire story at The Guardian.
Matthew Revert reviewed The Ass Goblins of Auschwitz over at Clockwork Father. Here’s what he had to say:
“The outrageously named, ‘Ass Goblins of Auschwitz’ is the kind of book that a potential reader can ascertain whether or not they’ll enjoy based on their reaction to the title. If the title tickles most of your funny bones, there’s a pretty good chance you’ll enjoy it. If not, perhaps steer clear. Being an avid fan of Nazi Exploitation films, I responded quite favorably to the title.
Gross out tomfoolery abounds as we are taken to an alternate Auschwitz, ruled by a flatulent race of beings called the Ass Goblins. They travel to a neighbouring planet and abduct children to work as slaves in their camp and when the mood strikes, they ferment them into cider. These children are subjected to all manner of unpleasantness as they try, seemingly in vain, simply to survive. The story revolves around two slaves, 999 and 1001, who are conjoined twins and their experiences within the camp. Suffice to say, in order to survive, they will have to consume their fellow slaves, construct toys out of their fellow slaves and endure various violations.
Okay, so we have ourself a story bound to appeal to those who like their fiction crazy and dripping in filth. It’s a fun read, despite the sense of darkness and hopelessness that permeates throughout. Where this story maybe falls a little flat is in areas concerning character development and genuine emotional connection. These children are subjected to abject horror but as a reader, I felt distanced from it. Character development exists but not in a meaningful way. This prevented it from truly affecting me and instead, I just found it immensely fun. I’m not going to complain about that too much because having a good time while reading isn’t a bad thing. And let’s face it, if you’re buying this book, you’re probably doing so because you’re attracted to OTT ideas involved.
Those who are fans of Bizarro will like this. It ticks all the boxes we’ve come to expect from the genre. Those unfamiliar with Bizarro but into Nazi Exploitation cinema should give this a go. These are the kind of Goblins Ilsa herself would be proud of.”
Today I discovered that Shark Hunting in Paradise Garden was reviewed over at SF Site. Here’s what they said:
“Apparently there is a genre called Bizarro Fiction. I hadn’t know about it before reading Shark Hunting in Paradise Garden by Cameron Pierce. Now I do. It touched me deeply. I have not yet decided if it was inappropriate touching.
While this is a short book, it is not one for the faint of heart. Death abounds, mostly from giant flying sharks. There’s blood, guts, violence, blasphemy, genesis and vampiric subterranean slug-fish. There’s no sex though, much to the apparent disappointment of one of the robots.
If you can cope with the idea of a man who has sturgeons growing out of every part of his body for no explained reason being the fellow priest of a man who can become a giant toad and turn people into mannequins, then this is probably a good book for you.
If the idea of giant mutant fruit sharks (such as the deadly banana shark) fighting a war against killer Vatican robots from the future for control of the Garden of Eden leaves you a bit cold, you should probably give this a pass.”
Kindle editions of Shark Hunting in Paradise Garden and The Ass Goblins of Auschwitz are now available!
If you own a Kindle, you can purchase an e-book version of Shark Hunting for $0.99 by clicking here.
To get the Kindle version of The Ass Goblins of Auschwitz, click here.
Michael Den Boer’s review of The Ass Goblins of Auschwitz is currently the featured review over at 10,000 Bullets. Here’s an excerpt:
Click on the excerpt to read the complete review.
